Saturday, February 27, 2010

What a Difference a Year Makes

One year ago today Drew and I were getting ready to go on a Pubcrawl with good friends. On a whim, I thought maybe I should take a pregnancy test, and that was the beginning of the rest of our lives! Our weekends sure have changed in the last year...from pubcrawls to tummy time and snuggling on the couch! We couldn't be happier though and I love our weekends together as a family!

Luke continues to be such a joy in our lives and lights up our days with his smiles and giggles!

My return to work this week was actually really good. It felt so good to know that Luke was with his grandparents and it made leaving him a million times easier. There is no way I could have dropped him off at daycare. He loved his days with the grandparents and I know they all enjoyed them too! It actually felt kind of good for me to get back in the swing of things for two work days. I'm definitely not ready for a full work week, but think I will get there over the next 8 weeks.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Three Months OId!

Today Luke is three months old! Time flies! Before Luke was born when I thought about him being three months old, I had no idea how much life he would have and how much he would already be able to do! He is such a flirt...smiling and giggling all the time! Its fun to watch him with the dogs...he is completely unphased when they lick his face, hands and feet. He just watches them...he probably thinks every baby has massive animals that lick their faces!

He is getting pretty big time now sitting in his Bumbo seat! Its fun to see him sitting up and looking all around, seeing the world from a new vantage point!

Luke and I spend most of our days just smiling and giggling at each other...sometimes when I put him in his crib for a nap he looks up at me and just gives me the cutest smile and laugh that I can't help but pick him back up and play with him a little more...I'm a total sucker for this kid!

I think its about time for Luke to have his first REAL three months old! I have already trimmed off his rat tail once around Christmas time, but now he really needs some shaping...I never thought I would have to take my three month old for a haircut!

Wednesday, February 10, 2010


I have begun to prepare for my return to work, just a mere 12 days away. I feel so fortunate that for the past 4 months I have enjoyed maternity leave at full pay and even more fortunate that when I do return on February 22nd that it will only be two days a week for the first 8 weeks. So, truth be told, April 19th is really D Day, but that doesn't change the fact that I am preparing, physically, mentally and emotionally.

Physically I have been preparing for months...the evidence fills our two freezers at home and my mom's deep freeze. I have saved enough milk to feed a small army of children. I may have been excessive and slightly compulsive about it. I am realizing that might be because the physical preparation is the easiest of the three for me to control.

Mentally, I am trying to get my head back in the game of work and corporate America. I am four months behind on email. Since I last worked my territory has changed, I have a new partner, a new product, and so many policies etc. have changed. I have a lot to catch up on. Additionally, I allowed myself to completely shut off the work side of my brain. I have avoided much of it because I felt like I owed that to little Luke, I wanted him to have my full and undivided attention as long as possible. As conflicted as I feel about my return to work, I must admit that as I started to organize my desk, thoughts and schedule I enjoyed feeling a little more intellectually stimulated again (I'm going to hold on to those positive feelings right now)!

Emotionally, I don't know that the reality of this one has even hit me. I have said it before on this blog, I had no idea how deeply I would fall in love with Luke. I love that each day I wake up and he surprises me as I watch him explore his world. The thought of missing any of these discoveries, quite honestly, breaks my heart and I can't bear to think about it. These past few weeks I have found myself holding on just a little tighter to him. I have been working on his schedule and having him consistently nap in his crib...I know I should let him fall asleep on his own in the crib, but lately I just want to keep rocking him, holding him and watching him sleep. I don't want to spend any time away from him because I feel like my days are numbered in a way. I know they really aren't, and I am sure that once we establish a new routine it will all be okay, but the transition is going to be hard for me. We are so lucky that while I work two days a week the first 8 weeks that Luke will be with my mom and Drew's mom. We are so fortunate that they are willing and able to spend one day a week with Luke. It puts my mind at ease to know that he will be with family and they are both so wonderful with him.

I am remaining optimistic about my return to work. It will be an adjustment, but one I am fortunate to be able to ease into. Just like I didn't know how motherhood would feel, I don't know how going back to work will feel once I make the adjustment. I have to trust that Luke will always know me, recognize me, and love me, regardless of my days spent at work. I will just value the time I spend with him even more.

Friday, February 5, 2010

Fun in the Snow!

This winter Kansas City has seen A LOT of snow, more than I ever remember having. Today, however, was the first snow that was perfect for playing! It wasn't too cold outside and it was the beautiful heavy wet, BIG snowflake type of snow!

So we took the opportunity to play outside for a bit and let Luke feel the flakes on his little face! We got him all bundled up in his fleece suit from Nonni and Papa!

At first he wasn't quite sure, but then he started looking all around and taking it all in!

My guess is we have a future skier on our hands!